Tuesday, July 22, 2008

I hate that I'm sometimes so pessimistic

So I've been thinking...maybe I'll move these negative, crabby posts to another location. I'm glad I wrote them, for I was able to release some of my pent up negativity, however, I've gotten WAY off the topic of what I wanted this blog to be....happiness, helping people, etc... It's kind of funny because I spend all school year excited about the idea of having some days off in the summer, and then summer comes and I get all depressed.

But maybe that same argument is a reason to leave these posts up here. It's proof that even people who genuinely want to be happy sometimes just have a hard time with it. I don't know if it's that I think too much, or that I'm hitting the "Oh my goodness, I'm 30" crisis, or that I'm afraid of what the future holds.

I try to remind myself that I'm here NOW, and I want to do what I can to help preserve the environment by reducing waste and reusing, well, everything! I love my job as a counselor, but when I really look within myself, I find that I'm happiest when I'm working on environmental things, whether it's creating things out of reused materials or making choices that are healthy for the environment. Is that what people consider "their calling"?

I keep adding to this blog, but I think I'm just going to post this and then work on getting some of my chores done now that it's stopped raining and it's light enough in the house to actually be able to see. A storm rolled in a couple hours ago and it was like nighttime in here!

(By the way, speaking of environmental things, I just have to mention something that made me smile... My friend Gina made my day when she told me that she uses cloth bags. Every little bit helps, and I was very, very happy, both that she uses the bags, and that she took the time to tell me about it :)

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