I got SO MAD at my dog yesterday!

I decided to go to the gym after work, so it was probably a little after 5 by the time I got home. I always drive into the garage, go into the kitchen door and put my stuff down, and then let Xander out of his crate and run him out the front door so he can go to the bathroom. But yesterday when I got to the kitchen door, I could hear him barking in the kitchen. I thought, "Oh crap, he got out of his crate!" Sure enough, he broke out...not sure when, but he definitely had enough time to destroy the house! He knocked a bowl off the wine rack...I'm surprised that it didn't shatter. He got anything that had touched food off the counter...a whole container of cookies that I had just baked, a roll, and a piece of bread (he ate right through the plastic bags and containers to get to the food inside). He emptied the waste basket in the living room and upstairs in the bedroom. Then he puked all night. I was so frustrated when I saw the mess, I screamed at him. I mean, nothing seems to work with this stupid dog. I've tried to teach him things that a "good dog" does...when he behaves, I reward him and pet him and fuss over him. But when he's bad, what am I supposed to do? I hate hitting him, although I will give him a swat if he jumps, another one of his bad habits, but I don't want to hit him in a place that's really going to hurt him. Unfortunately, when he jumps, the only part of him that I can really smack is his face or head, and I don't want to do that.

I thought that owning pets was supposed to be more fun than stressful, but my animals definitely cause me anxiety.